Thursday, January 31, 2008


Every morning I take six pills. This is sort of fitting as the number I used to do everything in was six. I would touch the door handle six times, check the lock six times etc. There are people who definitely take more, and there are people who take less. To be completely fair only four of them are prescribed.
I have two Fluoxetine (prozac) two wellbutrin (bupropion) and two Ginko biloba suplements.
The prozac is for OCD the wellbutrin is for depression, and the Ginko is for sexual side effects of prozac. It's quite a fun mess.

It's become part of my routine, wake up-eat-take pills, go to whatever I need to go to. I've even gotten in the habit of carrying my pills with me with me everywhere. Sometimes I'll end up someplace other than home, and frankly a day without pills is horrible. It's not so immediate, so three days without pills is a little like being mildly OCD, but one day is still a perceptible difference.
It's just interesting how these are now a part of my life, and unless I somehow find time to do therapy, will always be. (OCD therapy is like having another university course, there's homework and everything)

it just deserves a certain amount of credence. Sure I'm not drinking and smoking to self medicate or anything (I did do that for a while), but I still have to rely on something artificial to keep me sane. It's a little disturbing.

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